


(At least out loud) I won't say I'm in love

by Marguerite_Thian



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Disney References, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Matchmaker Friday, Mentions of other characters - Freeform, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Shenanigans, ShieldShock - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2019-12-05
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:02:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21682651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marguerite_Thian/pseuds/Marguerite_Thian
Summary: Exactly what it says on the tin.
Relationships: Darcy Lewis/Steve Rogers, Jane Foster & Darcy Lewis, Jane Foster/Thor
Comments: 14
Kudos: 131





	(At least out loud) I won't say I'm in love

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by [this post](https://reprehensiblewombat.tumblr.com/post/170419740818/so-one-night-jane-and-darcy-are-a-bit-drunk-and) by [@reprehensiblewombat](https://reprehensiblewombat.tumblr.com) on Tumblr. Title from I Won't Say I'm in Love, Hercules.

Darcy was drunk. Okay, fine, it was partly Jane's fault, but apparently Jane was drunk _also_ , so Darcy couldn't really blame it on her. But drunk Darcy, she knew, liked to do stupid things like singing loudly in public. All she needed to do right now, was to hold onto the last bit of self-control and self-preservation and do her best to not drink any more. 

'... Avengers are like Disney princesses,' Jane was saying. 

'Beg pardon?'

'Girl. I was saying, the Avengers are pretty much like Disney princesses. What d'ya think?'

Darcy pauses for three full seconds. 'Tony is Kuzco. Fight me.'

'Okay. That's pretty obvious. What about Natasha? Ariel?'

'Because of the hair?' 

'Mostly?'

'Jane, come on. I'm sure we can come up with something with different symbolism than that.'

'Anastasia?'

'First of all, not a Disney movie. Second of all, with the whole memory loss thing, we all know _Bucky_ is Anastasia.'

'Oooh, yeah, I like it. As long as Clint isn't Merida. We can do better than that.'

'Nooope. Clint's the boy from Brave who got the bullseye by accident.'

'Wee Dingwall?'

'You remember his name?' No one remembers his name. 

'I liked the movie!'

'It does have a lot of plaid in it.'

'Oh, shut up.'

'Is Thor Hercules?'

'Actually I think Thor is more of a John Smith.'

'Why? The hair again?'

'No. Thor was raised in a society that he considered to be more advanced than ours and he was only looking for adventure without regard for the people who happened to be here already and he learned that Migardians aren't savages after all... And also the hair.'

'You've given this some thought.'

'I've been trying to place Thor ever since we started this converaation.'

'I can paaaaint...'

'Darcy, no.'

'With aaaall the coloooours...'

'Darcy, please.'

'Oooof...'

'Don't'

'Theeee...'

'Shut up.'

'Bifroooost...'

'I hate you.'

They make squinty eyes at each other for a few moments, until FRIDAY says, 'Captain Rogers is Hercules. They both went from the small, skinny thing to a Wonder Boy.'

Jane laughs. 'Oh hell yeah! Zero to hero in no time flat!'

Darcy nearly squirts her apple juice out of her nose. 'Oh yeah. Zero to hero, just like that.'

And if anyone asks Darcy about it afterwards, she would swear she heard FRIDAY snicker.

* * *

Tony's walking into his lab when he first hears Kuzco's theme song. He squints at the ceiling and concludes that his AI's been hanging around with his favourite lab assistant a little too much. But he doesn't say anything against it. Truth be told, he quite likes the song. 

But it gets creepy when he finds that the song even plays when he's trying to think in the shower. But since Pepper thinks it's hilarious he doesn't do anything. He does, though, remind himself to check if there's anything wrong with FRIDAY when the song starts to sound weird in his head.

* * *

Bucky freaks out the first time he hears Once Upon a December. He really doesn't see what dancing bears have to do with anything. Not to mention that the song creeps the hell out of him. When he asks Darcy about it, she cackles outright and says, 'You're lucky you're not "Steeb". He has it worse,' and skips away, cackling like a witch. 

He gradually gets used to the song following him around the Tower, until one day FRIDAY decides to play it wherever he goes, when he's taking a shower, when he's making pancakes (that failed terribly), when he's trying to sleep. But he then learns to tune it out, and after a while it doesn't bother him that much.

* * *

Steve looks at the ceiling in confusion the first time FRIDAY plays Go the Distance at him. He frowns a little when she repeats the song again, and again, and again. Wherever he goes, the song follows him. The song starts to sound really weird and one day he finds that he cannot even hear the word 'distance' without wondering if that really is a word. 

He turns so pink he nearly flees the first time FRIDAY plays the song when he's in a room full of people. Pardon, let me rephrase, full of the occupants of the Tower. Darcy nearly dies laughing. Doctor Foster spits her drink back into her cup. Natasha and Bruce turn to look at him and laugh till they wheeze. Sam bites his cheeks to stop himself from grinning. Clint and Laura smiles at him while Cooper, Lila and Nate giggle. Pepper and Rhodey squint a little. Tony gives him a sympathetic smile and asks 'you too?'. Bucky just looks at him with pure glee. 

'Um...?'

Tony sips from his mug. 'I understood that reference, FRIDAY. But as it seems, our Captain here has yet to watch Hercules.'

Darcy stares at him in disbelief. 'Oh, no, how could you! That movie is a masterpiece and we must watch it now. FRIDAY, you know what to do.'

So they watch the movie, and - no, Steve is not amused. 

It's going to be a long week.

* * *

Darcy finds the whole ordeal ridiculously hilarious. 

She spits out biscuit crumbs when Tony asks her why has she corrupted his AI. She tells him that the song was FRIDAY'S idea, and he just stares at her with an exceedingly tired look. 

Bucky's is probably more hilarious. He ambushes her on the third day, demanding an explanation. Of the song or of why the song. She teases him and he gives her those puppy-dog eyes. But she does, though, soothe him by telling him that 'Steeb's' got it worse. He merely squints at her and she runs away, cackling. 

Surprisingly, Steve doesn't ask her about it. But FRIDAY shows her the footage of him dropping coffee powder all over the kitchen counter the first time he hears the song. She and Jane spend half an hour replaying the footage and another hour laughing over it. She doesn't realise that it's because he's never watched Hercules and he doesn't understand the reference until Tony rats him out. They make him watch the movie and when he scowls at her at the end, she laughs like a hyena and runs away.

* * *

It's all shits and giggles until FRIDAY does the thing. 

'Oh hell no. You've got all your wires crossed. I'm not interested in Steve like, at all.'

FRIDAY doesn't say anything. She just turns the volume up. 

She learns to tune it out and she's pretty grateful that she's pals with the AI, because at least FRIDAY has some sense and never played it when anyone except Jane is around. 

But Jane, like the asshole that she is, likes to sing it when Natasha's around, so that probably doesn't help things. Nat just grins impishly at her the first time Jane does the thing, and she's pretty sure she's fucked.

* * *

But fortunately for everyone, Natasha doesn't have to do her thing. 

FRIDAY'S doing her daily teasing while Darcy's baking chocolate chip biscuits in the kitchen. And if anyone asks her afterwards, she'd swear that FRIDAY did it on purpose, because Steve walks in that exact bloody second. 

She freezes and hides her embarrassingly pink face behind the mixer. Steve glances between her and the ceiling multiple times and finally fixes his gaze on her, grinning like a fool.

'I understood that reference, FRIDAY.'

And Darcy has to freaking bodily restrain herself from shrieking profanities at the ceiling. 

'Please shut up, FRIDAY,' but her face is redder than the macaroons she's supposed to be baking. 

Carefully avoiding eye contact, she turns to the cabinet to grab the piping bags. But she can't reach it. Her mum's short genes are definitely cursed. She jumps and tries to get herself onto the counter, and that's the moment she feels something - someone pressing firmly behind her and reaching up for the bags. How did he get so close so fast and so quietly?

She lets out a strangled sound. Shit. The man's warm. It's like a human furnace. And she's sandwiched between said human furnace and the kitchen counter.

She uses all her might to turn herself to face him, and he stares down at her, gaze full of something she doesn't quite understand.

And then he _bends himself over her_ and whispers, ever so softly in her ear, 'Tell me I'm reading the situation wrongly,' and before her brain manages to unfreeze, his lips are warm on hers. Her traitorous brain finally manages to function before he pulls away, and she sinks her fingers into his hair, pulling him closer. When they finally pull apart, she's somehow ended up on the island, Steve between her legs.

'Whoa. Okay,' Darcy says, her brain function completely gone.

And Steve, that sweetheart, bends over her again, murmuring, 'We should go for coffee, sometime,' before kissing her again.

And Darcy'd count that as a win.

**Author's Note:**

> Please tell me that wasn't too bad. Tell me what you think!


End file.
